Grace hijacked my body!

Grace, my gorgeous baby girl, has arrived! The baby who hijacked my body is finally here!

Those of you who know me on a personal level know that Seth and I were convinced we were having a boy. We just had a "feeling". Most of our family was guessing boy, strangers looked at the shape of my belly and said boy, and one of the times the doctor listened to Grace's heartbeat he said, "sounds like a boy!"

There were things I was looking forward to about having either gender. If we would have had a boy I was excited to dress him up like a superhero and wear "little man suits" on Easter Sunday. For baby girls, there's just something about being able to dress a tiny human in a frilly dress that makes me so happy. The bottom line though was that I just wanted a baby and I was so excited either way. But because I thought we were having a boy I was excited for boy things and thought the little girl things would have to wait until baby number two or possibly never happen at all. When we were in the labor room we told the doctor and nurses we wanted Seth to tell me the gender when baby came out. If I could go back in time and sound record one moment of my life it would be Seth screaming with the most excited, happy, and surprised voice I have ever heard, "IT'S A GIRL!!!" We were both so in shock and so elated that our baby was finally here! She is absolutely perfect. So far, being a mom has surpassed any hope and expectation I had. I look at her and I am speechless.

Yesterday after I was done feeding her, I put her tummy on my chest and just watched her sleep. I ran my finger down her back and felt her tiny backbone, her shoulder blade. My eyes welled up with tears for about the billionth time as I praised God for giving me something so pure and so perfect. All week I had just been thanking God over and over for getting me through the delivery, for blessing us with a healthy baby, and for supportive family and friends. I was in so much awe that God would bless Seth and me with everything we've ever wanted. As I was admiring God's creation that snoozed on my chest, I realized that although God wants me to have a grateful attitude, He also wants me to embrace Him and enjoy Gracie together. I had been so focused on making sure I worship Him as my Creator and the Creator of my daughter, but I finally realized I serve a God who wants not just admiration from me, but a relationship as well. The tears that were pooling in my eyes spilled down my cheeks as I embraced the One who gave me Gracie and allowed myself to experience the joy of His gift together.

I'm saving my labor experience for next week because I need more time to write it all down. So for now I will leave you with some of the ways in which my body is still hijacked because of my beautiful Gracie.

My belly button is no longer "out"
My non-maternirty t-shirts still don't fit...not because of my enormous belly though. they don't fit for a new reason. Breastfeeding moms, do you follow??
I slept for a two hour chunk straight last night for the first time since she was born and when I woke up I felt like a bear waking up from hibernation. Two hours now feels like ten.
Yesterday I got to wear jeans for the first time in over two months. They zipped and I did a little dance!

My belly is significantly smaller but I keep examining it in the mirror and thinking, "Please tell me it's not done shrinking." I am definitely anxious to be back to my pre-baby size someday but I know it will take time.

Seth's parents are staying with us for a few more days and last night they offered to watch Grace if we wanted to go out into the real world together for a little date. We decided even though part of our hearts were screaming, "NEVER WILL WE LEAVE OUR SWEET BABY GIRL!" we knew it's something that would have to be done eventually and who better to leave her with for the first time than with a grandma and grandpa? We went to Target and thought it would be really special if we picked out a little outfit for Gracie now that we know we have a girl. It was so fun being able to focus our attention on who exactly we were shopping for. In the checkout lane I was telling Seth how I think my belly pooch looks like I am about four or five months pregnant and since I'm actually not pregnant I would like it to go away.  He was saying how funny it would be if a stranger asked me how far along I was and how embarassing it would be for them to tell them I had just had a baby. The woman at the check out was this little old Indian woman. She looked at the cute girly dress we had picked out for Grace and then said with a huge smile on her face, "When the baby coming??" I laughed and said, "She came on Monday!" She looked at my belly then back up at me and smiled very sheepishly. I smiled back at her and hoped she knew I wasn't offended. I thought it was hilarious.

I'm looking forward to sharing with everyone how God protected Grace and me during the delivery process. I'll leave you with a little teaser and say that if we had made a couple different choices, things could have been very dangerous for both of us.

I'll also leave you with a photo of Grace's first bath. She cried the entire time and enjoyed cuddling with her daddy afterwards.

Blessings and feeling very blessed myself,
Momma Shan :)